Category Archives: Longer words put in order


Police at the location where Scaglione and Lo ...

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Onward and onward I march
to this place in my heart where darkness grows
There’s a light leading me away from this hate
but a pain in my chest keeps driving me on
There are words to be said and nerves to be fed
You struck the chords that lay dormant in bed
And now as I approach this place that you keep
I hope that when I find you you’ll be asleep

Onward and onward I march
to the place where I left you when I said goodbye
Bills have been paid and claims never made
but no material possessions could return what you took
No words to be said but actions instead
and now that I’ve found you you’ll dance with the dead
Up comes the hammer, glistening above your head
Darkness enfolds as the room turns red…

My silence…
You should have taken it as a warning.

Back I am

Assistant to Cape Minstrels

Image by Ingrid Sinclair via Flickr

Happy New Year to all!

I’m back from a rather interesting journey in beautiful Cape Town, South Africa.

To kick things off I’d like to share that I got engaged on the 29th of December to the most fantastic woman that I have ever met!

I thought the above would bring 2011 in with a great start but the universe decided to show me the true brunt of Murphy’s Law.
We were stuck in Cape Town for a week after we were supposed to leave because my car decided to blow off a bit of steam and a head gasket, great stuff. That’s day 1 of not leaving.

I received a R17 000 quote, responded hell no and fetched my car. That’s day 2 of not leaving.

My dad decided to make the 1400 odd kilometer drive from Johannesburg and tow us back home. That’s day 3 of not leaving.

My dad arrives, we load the trailer with much effort and leave for good old Jozi. We must have driven for 20 minutes when my dad’s fan belt decided to bow out. That’s day 4 of not leaving.

We repair the fan belt and what ever else went wrong and leave. We completed the first 400 km part of the journey home and arrived in Beaufort West to discover a strange smell coming from the trailer. It turns out that the wheel bearings decided to bow out too. That’s day 5 of not leaving.

Day 6 ushered in an afrikaans mechanic and finally the remaining 13 hours of travel home.

2011 kicked off interestingly and hopefully will remain interesting so that I am kept constantly inspired.

God knows why…

Vanishing Forests

Vanishing Forests - United States. Wikipedia

I walked through the past
The dust had yet to settle
and in it I found God
I marvelled at His creation
I saw it in its entirety

We walked through lush grass
A smell indescribable greeted my nose
I breathed it in deep and savoured its scent
I asked God about the nature of the smell
We sat at the foot of a mountain and he explained it to me

Before man arrives, the Earth is whole
This is the smell of new, this is my own scent
When my scent becomes irrelevant the Earth begins to crumble

I breathed in deeply one more time
This foreign, fresh and all encompassing scent danced through me
A tear fell from my eye as I looked up
I was greeted by a plain of green
Mountains pushed themselves through this glorious scene

I saw the ocean breaking at the foot of a mountain
Dust and steam were being broken by birds
Animals of all kinds walked up to me
We greeted each other and they sat at the foot of God
I saw creatures that I had never set eyes upon before

Before man arrives these animals are whole
These are creatures that will not know tomorrow, only today
When I become irrelevant these creatures shall slowly fade away

Another tear fell from my eye as I saw the animals walk away
I then looked up again and found myself inside a forest
God was climbing a tree and beckoned me to join Him
On a branch we sat side by side and took in the serenity
I asked God where we are and He explained it to me

Before man arrives this piece of Earth will be whole
This is eastern North America, Maine to Florida across to Texas
When I become irrelevant this forest will fall away leaving geological decay

And I held on to God as I wept
Why create man if you know what is to come?
God just smiled at me and tapped His nose
I guess it is true what they say because
only God knows…

Daft Questions

3D Character and Question Mark

Image by 姒儿喵喵 via Flickr

People ask many questions on a daily basis, but they never seem to stop and just listen to themselves.
There are so many stupid questions floating around out there that I had to compile this list of 6 Daft Questions.

Daft Questions:

1. Can I ask you a question?

How exactly am I supposed to respond to this question? I, at the moment, have a boy in my class who has recently developed the habit of starting a question by asking this question. Gag me please!

2. Do you know what?

If I knew what, why would you be asking me? What is the point of a question questioning your knowledge when the enquirer knows that you do not know because generally this is followed by an observation on the current topic of conversation. An observation which you yourself have not yet made. Gag me again please!

3. Do you know what s/he did?

Yet again, if you are in the process of telling me because you know I was not in the location of the action, why the hell would I know what s/he did?

4. Where are you going?

There is generally a reason when somebody does not tell you where they are going.
“I am on the way to remove my underpants from my crack. Would you like to accompany me? I could really use the support.”

5. Mr. Gray, can I talk to you?

You have just proven that you have the capacity to engage in conversation with me. Why ask if you are capable of such a thing?
(This only tweaks me on days like today though…)

6. How are you?

People don’t really care how you are when they ask you this. The thing that gives this truth away is the fact that they will ask as they are either walking or running right past you. What is the point of asking if you don’t really understand the crux of your question? Just say hello.

Think about the words that are leaving your mouth and infecting the ears of your victim before you talk!


Spc. Robert R. Newbanks titled this image, “Ca...

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How often do you look back at yourself?
Do ever pick up old forgotten photos and see the naivety of yourself back then? Do you ever find that you begin to feel regret and a need to time travel back with a warning for that person in that photo? If you could go back, what would you tell yourself? Don’t sleep with that person? Don’t fall in love with that one? Don’t smoke that? Don’t go out on October 21st?

Do you see what you have lost and wonder if you would ever get it back? Would you want to? Do you ever look at that person in the photograph and wonder if you two could ever have been friends? Would that person forgive you for the direction your life has taken? Would that person blame you or praise you? Would that person feel betrayed, belittled, forgotten? Would you be dead to the person in the photo?

Change the point of view, place yourself in the photo, place yourself on the inside looking out.
What do you see? Who do you see?
Are you at peace? Are you at one? Are you at all?

This Moment

Is there anything more beautiful than knowing that the person you hold at night is wondering the same thing as you? Wondering if there is anything more beautiful than this moment right now? This moment of togetherness, this moment of hearts in unison, this moment of pure perfection, given and blessed by God and his love?

When you hold that person close, do you feel as if your blood is flowing through her and that hers is flowing through you? Do you find yourself pondering the misery of existence before she entered your life and made it whole? Do you find that you lose yourself more and more with every breath that she takes?

Have you found the one?

The one that is one amongst many according to the masses who just don’t know, the same masses that believe there is more than one person out there for everyone. If there is more than one person out there, why have I never felt so complete? Can you be more complete than complete?

Have you found the one?

The one that despite everything compares more than any other person in your life. The one that stands out as one amongst many. The one that broke the mould. The one that makes every cliché make sense and gives rise to wonderful new metaphors, similes and idioms. Have you found that poignant one that is your all and you want to keep as your all?

Have you found the one? Have you found this moment? Have you found your eternity?

Call me shallow but…

This is going to sound stupid and possibly shallow but I need to express it because it has made me feel good and even more like a human being than a robotic teacher.

My birthday is coming up on the 28 September. School breaks up tomorrow, the 23 September, which means that I’m not going to be at school for my birthday – and the choir sang AWESOME harmoniously.

The grade 4 class next door to me in a loud timed chorus all wished me happy birthday for the 28th. I was then greeted by big smiles on my grade 6 class’ faces because they orchestrated the first surprise.

I lead the class into my classroom where one of kids – who I have nicknamed Vlotz – gave me a present in a bag. This was followed by another boy – who I call Tit because he is so much like my friend Tiisetso, who we nicknamed Tit for short – gave me another gift.

Tit gave me a huge slab of chocolate, which next to Tarryn and smoking is my next biggest addiction. Vlotz gave me a pack of wicked biscuits, a card, and a R200 music voucher. That’s a lot of money to spend on a dude who gets paid to crap you out on a daily basis.

It’s gestures like these that turn me into a contradiction. How I hate my job, how I love my job. These kids, and the other 25 in my class, are simply the most wonderful children out; even the ones that are in a competition to end up in Juvenile Detention first.

Death Valley Hiatus

This entry is a repost that I deleted and then put up again and then deleted and am now putting up again. I took it off because I want to do this thing justice but I keep feeling that I’m missing it like a beast.

This was first written on 17 August 2010 after a wicked weekend that was filled with beer, laughs, love and heartbreak.

This is a tribute to a band that, in my ‘expert’ opinion, has changed the face of music in South Africa – most notably underground South Africa. This band has sadly called a hiatus after over a decade of playing.
The reason that they have called a break to their amazing sound is the fact that the South African music industry is impossible to crack if you are MORE talented than The Parlotones and better looking than Steve Hofmeyer.

I’m not going to complain about the industry though. I’m going to give a shot at praising for a change – not the industry however.

The Death Valley Blues Band has shut down operations and has left a hole in my social life and interest in bands. For those of you who don’t know about this prolific band you need to, firstly, beat your head in with a blue hammer, and secondly, check them out on MySPACE. The sound clips do them ABSOLUTELY no justice what-so-ever as they are primarily a live act but it is well worth the listen.

They consist of 7 members but have been known to have up to 12 people on stage performing. They are a bluesy swingy rocky type of act, but due to my loathing of labels, you cannot take my word for the type of genre. Let’s just call their musical genre: sex.

My girlfriend and I were lucky and sober enough to catch their last two shows in Jo’burg. The Friday night gig, which was held at The Bohemian in Auckland Park, was amazing despite the guitar amp calling it an evening half way through the second song, but the situation was handled gracefully as the lead singer and rhythm guitarist’s (Kevin) guitar was stolen from him a few times in order to deliver a deadly solo that painted every colour possible across your sound receptors.

While enjoying this musical assault on our ears, the news arrived as I was speaking to a boyfriend of the band,
“Dude, they’re splitting up but you can get a CD from Ampie,”


Tears were going to greet my face but I took it like a man and downed my beer instead.

The news of a band splitting up generally gets greeted by people saying things like, “Dude, it’s about time! These muso’s suck more than a black hole on its period.” or, ‘Man, I can’t believe it! This is my first time hearing them,’ or it is greeted by people laughing when the band announces it and then realisation sets in,
‘Uh…they’re serious?’
“Unfortunately we are! Thanks for coming out and supporting us but…”
Death Valley gave no ‘but’.

And that is the thing about Death Valley; they’re more about ‘butt’ than ‘but’. Their music has guided many a stoner into greener pastures of sativa draped highs and many a drunk into a happy stupor of disbelief,
“Dude, they’re South African? How hot is that chick! Is that Ampie Omo? What type of name is that? Why are they singing about shrimp cheese? What? Oh… striptease, they should pronounce things clearer,”
“You should hear clearer,”

The Saturday gig was insane. It was held at the new Cool Runnings in Victory Park, an awesome venue – especially considering that the band plays on pretty much the floor and not a stage in the traditional sense.

Naturally the band blew the roof off the place and had their amps working perfectly. The crowd was mental and the booze was crystal. An incredible end to an incredible era, despite the fact that they will most likely return in February 2011 for a 3 week tour, the era has ended because it has closed a chapter for me and my lady – no more skipping out on other things in order to catch Death Valley. Pity…

So what is the point of all this rambling that most likely reads as if it was written by a hormonal teenager in standard 8?

Every once in a while a band comes along that helps you remember why you fell in love with music and why you use your hard earned money to go and watch the bands that you want to support. The Death Valley Blues Band is that type of act. They put the fun back into the live experience because they understand their audience and they don’t really give a shit about conformity. They are the type of band that you punt to all your friends and force them to see. They are the type of band that your sister-in-law would never enjoy listening to until she sees them live and then ends up buying their CD. They are the epitome of variety and a constant crowd pleaser.

Death Valley Blues Band, you will be sorely missed, but until your return I will spread the gospel of Death Valley, I’ll ‘shake some tail’ and ‘send in the planes’.
Thanks for reminding me why I fell in love with music and why South African music will remain more colourful than any other scene.

But that’s just my opinion…

Useless Complaining

What the hell is up with people watching this Big Brother Africa crap?

Is it really that interesting watching a group of men and women doing strange mating ritual dances and saying things to each other that constantly proves that their intellect is slipping? What does it say about the viewers? Those people that sit and watch the show with their mouths wide open, passing comments about this one saying that and the size of this other ones that.

I ask these pressing questions because I am tired of being subjected to this crap in my house. Whenever my father turns on the television he goes straight to this bullshit program. Yes I do still live at home – this is the plight of many young teachers in South Africa, we don’t get paid enough to move out, instead we stay at home plotting of ways to leave home while being made to watch garbage.

Who came up with this program? Why are they allowed to keep showing it? Why is the seriousness of George Orwell’s work being turned into a television program? When will this end?

The Beast Beckons

Right, I’m letting go of the beast and going the whole nicotine replacement route. Fantastic! Well done me…

I am going INSANE!

Life is filled with displeasure and unhappiness – mine is currently self created. Think about it, I’m attempting to quit smoking and as a result I am turning into an unhappy, grumpy old fart who just threw his drum sticks across the room because nothing is feeling right. Don’t worry, I am alone, bar the piano which unfortunately got in the way.

My not smoking is making me unhappy, a mood which is going to impact not only myself but my beautiful lady as well as she is going through the motions too.

I managed to spare my children from the dreaded pits of hell and now the next fight is to do the same for my lady. Which brings me to my next excuse…

Why should we be made to feel unhappy and disillusioned with life and in the process be dragged down? Wouldn’t we both benefit if we just light up another portable cloud of cancer?

A fantastic excuse but one that only seems that way through the high of the withdrawing beast.

Will I give in?
I hope not… or then again, I hope so… or then again, I hope not.